Reflecting on 12 Years + A Lot of Ambition

I wrote this blog post back in 2012 after just a year of blogging. I remember feeling eager, nervous, passionate, determined to jump into life. I would talk about my blog to anyone who would listen. I was excited that I was doing something that brought me joy, comfort, and a sense of belonging. I could be who I wanted to be and share the things that brought light into my life. Ambitious Kitchen was a place of positivity, vulnerability, and openness. And it wasn’t just about the food and recipes. It was about how the food and recipes made me feel. And sharing that with all of you was the one of the best things that has ever happened to me.

Flash forward 12 years later and my first cookbook is finally set to release. And dang, I’m proud of myself. It’s been a beautiful journey. Imperfect and flawed, but still so beautiful. It’s a journey that I never thought would have led me to where I am today. And as I head into this season, I have enjoyed reflecting on the moments and memories from the past that helped contribute. I thought I’d share this one with you all again, so you can see how much has changed over the past decade, and read more about why I do what I do (and why I still love it to this day!).

As always, thank you for reading AND thank you from the bottom of my heart for always supporting Ambitious Kitchen.

I can’t believe that I’ve been blogging for nearly a year! It seems like forever ago, I was sitting in my college house attempting to determine what I would call this blog.

It also seems like yesterday I was helping my Dad in the kitchen; we were always baking together. Our favorite thing to bake was a moist yellow cake with a simple, but extraordinary homemade chocolate frosting (also known as the best birthday cake in the world). Although the recipe is simple, I don’t know it’ll ever taste the same. I’m simply not sure I could ever put enough care, or for the matter, enough love into a cake like he did.

Every time we made chocolate frosting, Dad would always add in a little freshly brewed coffee. When I asked why, his answer was simple, “Coffee enhances the chocolate flavor.” I remember looking at him like I was puzzled, and he responded, “Because that’s just the way it is Loveys (my childhood nickname).”

And I was okay with his answer, because it was Dad telling me so. He made things so easy to understand.

Our days were simple together. We had fun flipping pancakes, flying kites, and reading books. I drew pictures of him while he watched TV. Once we even made homemade butter because I was obsessed with Laura Ingalls Wilder for a good six months. Our moments of laughter will never be forgotten in my heart. And yet after nearly five years of life without him, I still ache for our weirdness; our absurd obsession with cake, pickles, and the perfect sandwich. These past five years could never erase any moment with him; it just brings a better appreciation.

Losing him was a striking, bold moment in my life that left me wondering what I was meant to do, how I would survive without a parent… or simply carry on. But I did, and will continue to. I’m pouring my heart into my passion.

You see, there are moments in life when you are blindsided, and it will happen to you, I promise. Why? Because it happens to everyone.  Life is simply a building experience of beauty, tragedy, and significant moments that change us for the better, even if we can’t see it in the present. Our defining moments are our worst moments, yet remembering the positivity behind every life experience can enable us to flourish.

I decided that I would never live my life waiting for the what-ifs; for those unexpected moments to sneak up on me. Of course I’m not perfect; I just want to experience what life has to offer. I know what I’m capable of, where my passion lies, and how hard I have to work to get there. Maybe the odds are against me, but I’d rather try to do something and fail then always wonder about what-ifs.

I also want to enjoy living in the moment… and right now that includes eating pancakes every single morning.

A year ago I didn’t think I would be living in Washington DC. Six months ago I never knew that I would be making my way to California. It never crossed my mind that I’d ever be dreaming of being a chef, or a cookbook author! But these were choices, and I’m choosing to design my life.

I have plenty of goals that I want to accomplish in my next year of blogging. I want to cook more and challenge my abilities in the kitchen. I’m hoping to improve my photography and writing as well. Last but not least, I’m going to bring a more personal touch to Ambitious Kitchen… there might even be some cooking videos!

Anyway, maybe now you can see why I’m so passionate about the things I do: about food, this blog, and mostly just about life. And when I ask myself why I’m a little overly ambitious, I can almost hear my Dad say, “Because that’s just the way it is Loveys.

I hope you’ll continue to read Ambitious Kitchen as it continues to grow and change. Thank you all so much!